Nya bilder på Instagram se här :)

Min Instagram : Check it Out here 🙂

Som de flesta av er har märkt så har jag väldigt roligt med bilder på min Instagram. Jag är ju en kreativ liten konstnär i grund och botten med allting. Så jag gillar ju att ordna med även bilder. Det är inte det lättaste kan jag ju tycka men det är jätte kul. En del bilder som jag gör och lägger upp kanske inte är av de bästa men det här blev efter några tappra försök att trycka på rätt knappar 😛 Jag gillar den här bilden mest av de liknande som jag la upp på min instagram igår. Jag är ju även en gammal Technotrancedancegirl och jag kan sakna att stå och dansa hela nätterna. Det går ju inte göra det nu för tiden på samma sätt. Det är ett helt annat liv men visst så blir det några TranceDance steg här hemma ibland högst 1 gång/år någonstans utomlands ståendes på den högsta högtalaren. Eller som på båten Patricia i Stockholm där för jätte många år sedan då det var modevisning och jag fångade DJ och de flesta på båtens ögon då jag drog loss ordentligt nere på dansgolvet till så grym musik att jag ofta vill tillbaka dit. Jag hade varit hos frisören och rakat mig i nacken så att det såg ut som ett rutmönster och jag hade ställt håret rakt upp. Haha det var tider det ! Ni som var DJ den kvällen och minns den lilla TechnoTranceDanceGirl ni får gärna ge er till känna. I Love YOU  🙂  Det här att många ofta trodde att jag var en inhyrd dansare som arbetade med att åka runt som professionell dansare och stå på högtalare var riktigt kul. På den tiden så var det lite av min dröm.

Det livet är glamoröst på ett sätt samtidigt som baksidan av det livet  är mycket alkohol och annat. Det beror ju på vart man hamnar. Jag har varit ute så mycket och jag är väldigt van vid att ta hand om mig själv. Jag har hamnat i många situationer där det varit väldigt farligt i möte med andra människor och där det gäller att spela sina kort rätt. Jag var ju ett lätt byte när jag var ute det trodde många i alla fall. Jag kan inte sitta här och berätta alla gånger som det varit riktigt farligt. Jag kan berätta om en gång som jag inte klassar som jätte farligt alls utan bara irriterande. Det hände på ett av mina favorit ställen Göta Källare. Den gången då det var mindre kul var den gången då jag fick en jätte stark kille efter mig som jag träffat tidigare men inte ville umgås med den kvällen. Då är jag väldigt bestämd och envis men han drog tag i min arm och försökte prata med mig. Det ville inte jag så jag drog åt andra hållet. Trots att han var ca 4 gånger så mycket starkare som mig så hade jag bra teknik eller något. Jag kunde hålla emot så pass att han inte kunde dra mig bort från dansgolvet och ut ur klubben. Jag började tänka och i allting så fick jag nog väldigt mycket adrenalin så jag tröttnade på att han drog i min arm ordentligt. På något sätt så tog jag mig loss från greppet. Det var ett vanligt handledsgrepp men det gick inte att göra det där vanliga rycket. Oftast så är vakterna på väg och hinner att ingripa  men jag tog mig ofta loss och det blev den här nickningen mot vakten att : Det gick bra så kunde de hålla borta de som jobbade sig. När jag varit ute med mitt gäng på ca 10 personer som dessutom varit killar så har jag alltid fått vara ifred. Men där ville jag själv försöka att ta mig ur situationer själv för det blir inte bra om 10 stycken hungriga vargar går in och ska skydda hela tiden när jag får någon efterhängsen snubbe efter mig  😀 . Sen stor eloge till alla killar som på ett eller annat sätt har hjälpt mig när jag har varit ute. Jag är ju liten och folk vill gärna bära omkring på mig särskilt när de är påverkade haha  😛 det kan bli ganska dumt. När vakterna får säga till andra människor på uteställena att eeehh du släpper ner tjejen på en gång HAHA  😀 . Sen får jag höra Förlåt det var inte meningen att lyfta upp och bära omkring på dig men du var så söt  😀 .  

Det här långa som jag beskrev nyss händer ju så snabbt på några sekunder. Jag är van att röra mig i diverse olika kretsar med diverse olika människor och det är olika koder i olika umgängen. Så även fast jag kan sakna den här tiden så var det just en tid i mitt liv. Nu lever jag helt annorlunda i dag. Nu lever jag mycket bättre. Jag har mycket erfarenhet av den här tiden oavsett glädje och sorg. 

Ta hand om Varandra 

Många Kramizar MinikeGirl 

 

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So instead of being passive then there are those who want me to be there so I’m going to do even more things :)

I had planned so much for this year, and I had already started to prepare me, as you know, since long time back. It was not at all as I had imagined. Of course, it feels as it always boring. The good thing is that I have written some new songs that I will record as soon as I get the time. So there will always something positive out of it is negative. I have learned to manage it well. It is now I am going to manage even better than what I have done before.

The most important thing for me is to never give up and it has taken me here where I am today. My journey and my personal development is something I’m very proud of.

It heats up in the soul when I see you listening to my music and read my blog. I have many new ways of thinking that arose when it as I planned not become of as I wanted to. So now I’m going to take and start work with my new ideas and they are many  🙂 

So instead of being passive then there are those who want me to be there so I’m going to do even more things. Something that will be a real losing game for those who are sabotaging me and want me to stop doing what I’m doing. The one that will go into this with a competitive I am and that will be even more unbreakable I’m. Don’t take the fights with me if you don’t want to lose hard and for always. Do not spend time trying to destroy me but to make any sense of your own life instead.

Now I’m going to continue to be the strong person that I am. I will not allow the loser to win that they themselves did not take hold of their own problems. As I said before, I work daily to I’ll be the best that I can be.

Take Care Of Each Other 

Many Hugs From MinikeGirl 

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I will buy a new mobile next week, so it is not as long as I am without mobile :)

 

It was a big cozy on new year’s eve with friends and good food.

It has been a very calm transition, as usual for me when there is new years  😛 

Feels wonderful that there is new year despite the fact that my own network is fighting and my mobile phone is broken. So before I got a new mobile so it gets a bit awkward with it all.

I will buy a new mobile next week, so it is not as long as I am without mobile. 

Hope you have had a good start to the new year   🙂 

Take Care Of Each Other

Many Hugs From MinikeGirl

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Sometimes I need to let my common sense instead of my curiosity to be the major overall factor :)

I got this lovely beautiful necklace of my son for christmas. 

It has been a fantastic christmas with much love. Fun to meet family and friends.  As I wrote earlier so I’m going to continue with music in the year 2019 which will be big fun.

I have certainly gained many new perspectives on life over the past year and it has taken on my energy. It has also given me energy. I’ve got a bit of a different note which I like and it will be good for me. 

Sometimes I need to let my common sense instead of my curiosity to be the major overall factor  😛 

Hope you have a lovely christmas holiday  🙂 

Take Care Of Each Other 

Many Hugs From MinikeGirl 

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Meet lovely friends and close acquaintances :)

Woke up relatively early today here in the morning. It has come a little more snow here in Sweden. Hope that may be left now over christmas. It is a part that should be here before christmas, however, not so much because I have arranged with most of the time.

 I will enjoy the holiday season and really eat good food and meet lovely friends and close acquaintances.

Will be great now with little else happening now over both christmas and new year.

Thank you for listening to my music 🙂 : 

Take Care Of Each Other 

Many Hugs From MinikeGirl

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Give the time to the people who actually are there and supporting you :) !

I am very proud of myself because I know how much I struggle and work every day. I have established a good structure that I maintain and I have good order in my everyday life. It feels amazing that I have been able to work so much with my music. It feels incredibly inspiring to continue with my music in the year 2019. This year has given me many new lessons about much. I have also become more confident in things that I already knew before. I has taken me forward as I always do, despite the adversity of many different kinds.

Many people do not understand is that I make the best of my life. I have learned not to get anxious for it that I’m not capable of and I have learned not to compare myself with other people. I have done enough in my life. There are still a few people I know who constantly tries to remind me of what I can’t. They are very negative and they spread negative energy. Just for that I went education and got good grades so it does not mean that I automatically become free from my mental illness. I trained and worked within my subject and I did it well. It worked more than good and I thrived in my workplace. It is and always will be the workplace where I feel like I could be myself and everyone respected me for who I am. My choice to not work was my own choice. After at least 20 years of experience and struggling so I wanted to finish everything in the best way. I wanted to stop working when it worked and when I felt strong. Not like other jobs when I had time to be sick and have felt me incredibly failed as a person. Lived in a bad circle where my anxiety prevented me from doing anything. I have for several recurring times in my life started over and over again with everything. Fresh starts with new perspectives and motivations in life. Known to this time I fix it. It has always gone to hell and I have ended up on the bottom several times. I know within myself that I have chosen to not work at a regular job to get a further better balance in my everyday life.

There are people who point out how pity it is that I am not working then I have my education. There are those who think that all the time I should do more. There are those who will never be satisfied with what I do. There are envious people who are trying to press me down. It all these people have missed completely is that I am a winner. I make the best of the situation and I’m doing it more than good. We must not forget here that the people who complain the most are those who do not have any knowledge about mental illness and they definitely have not any knowledge about me. 

I have the knowledge about mental illness and I know how I work. I’m tired of explaining everything all the time for people who question everything. Many will never understand me. What they need to do is to respect my choices in my life. Never forget that how much you wonder, and how strange it all is.

How weird you think I am?

What you think I should do?

How you think I should live ?

You can keep your questions and you can keep your requirements on how you think I should exist. I have been questioned my whole life and I am the one who has challenged me the most. I have been brutal and I have been wild. I have had the most questions about myself than you will ever have together. I’ve doubted myself and I have compared me with other people. I have known that it doesn’t matter what I do so there will never be enough.

 

I have chosen to feel good and to continue making music and blogging. I have chosen not to compare me with other people. I have also chosen not to do so as some do when they compare my best and worse days. I have chosen to accept all of the days both the worse and the better. People who are still questioning me is not respecting me and it is sad, however, is their problem. I have found my way to get everything to work more than well. As I opened this post by so I am proud of myself. 

My questions are : Have you reflected on your own life ? Are you questioning my life and my choices for that you simply are unintelligent ? I am a person who is better than you  think so you have a hard time accepting it ? Do you think I listen more at you than at my doctors, and psychologists ? Have you forgotten that I am educated in this? Have you considered that your questioning has to do, that you yourself are not satisfied with your own life? 

Year 2019 : going to be the year in which the questioning people will not put me in any situation where I will have to defend myself by their questions. In 2019, they only accept the position if either wonder forever or to start to accept me as a person. Respect me or leave !

You will always have these condescending people around you, so don’t forget to believe in yourselves and give the time to the people who actually are there and supporting you. They may not always understand you, however,  but they respect you and your choices and they do not have the need to question you all the time. 

Take Care of Each Other  🙂

Many Hugs From MinikeGirl 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTz6y6T-ArV3gc7RyXqABcw      Here you can listen on my music and follow me on Youtube  😛 

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