Questioned Every Time

MinikeGirl

MinikeGirl

I takes me just longer and longer until, in my work with myself. It’s not that I don’t really know when it will be these slump periods, as you call it. I ignore completely when they will, if you say so, but many other people will be surprised when it happens. You will be questioned every time and it takes a lot of energy from me.

Each time I am well prepared I have noticed since I myself know how I operate, so it is not really a downswing in itself that is the most demanding. What is most demanding is the people who don’t understand. There is a difference between not understand and to not understand and to question in order to press down the person who is in a slump. One question, of course, not a newly-operated cardiac patient about why he is not at his work or at the gym. This question not for there is a great risk that the newly-operated die if they do not take it easy. But I then ? I who live with mental ill-health called into question every time when my soul needs rest in order to not wither away and die. I questioned why I do not work and are as good as any other. Just want to explain that when I have my worst days so I am as worn and tired as a newly-operated person.

 
It is then that those who do not understand the whole this thing with living with mental illness actually get to feel the fatigue that I have each day. Some days I’m less tired than other days. Feeling better and worse, it varies. But I am proud to be me and I do not doubt myself despite the fact that others do it. Despite the fact that the other does not understand how I work. My whole life I have worked by myself for me to be able to reduce the high and lows. What I notice is that the less other people have to compare it with, the more understanding and less questioning.
There is less questioning when I’m completely sick than when I can work good in some periods. So the healthier I get the more harder it will be with other people who don’t understand the whole process. I get discouraged in my own recovery and I compared all the time with my best and worst days.

 

This time when I ran out of energy in total is not that I have failed in what I’m doing, but it belongs to my continuous process to take me further and develop to the stronger :

  • I have written more songs than the last of my energy ran out . 11 songs on Spotify
  • I’ve added one more  work area at the later time.
  • I also work here at the Finest20170418_141023.jpg
So when many people are still stuck in their position as a major question mark so I am constantly under development and I’ll take me forward. I am learning all the time to use my gear that I have and I can not find something that works so I create a new gear for it.
Stop trying to explain to people who do not want to understand, surround yourself with people who allow you to be regardless of whether they understand you or not.
Take care of each other 😀
Many Hugs From MinikeGirl 😛 

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